Fire in the hospital

There was a fire in the hospital. After successfully stopping the fire, the chief reports to the hospital director: “The fire was extinguished. In the basement we have found seven victims. We applied mouth to mouth, and one was revived, but unfortunately, we did not succeed with the rest.”
Hearing the news the Hospital Director faints.
When he finally comes to, the fireman is asking why did he faint.
The director say: "There is nothing else in the basement, except the morgue."

Any Key

Microsoft seriously considering to change the "Press any key" command to the "Press Enter" command because their tech support is swamped with calls from customers who can not find the "Any" key on the keyboard.

Angels

A little girl asking her father: "Daddy what is an angel?"

The father says, "An angel is a pedestrian who tried to jump out of the way too late..."

Forgiveness

Always forgive your enemies.... Nothing pisses them off more.

Uneployed Dog

A dog walks into a job centre, goes up to the woman at the desk and says,
“Good afternoon, miss. I’m looking for work.”

The woman looks up, amazed, and says, “Good heavens, a talking dog! Er … well, let’s try the circus in town. I’ll give them a ring.”

The dog says, “The circus? What on earth would the circus do with a computer programmer?”

Email and life

An unemployed man applies for a Janitor's job at Microsoft.

They call him in, and to test him, they make him sweep the floor. After a job well done, they ask him for his email address, so they can send him the proper forms and the date for starting the job.

The jobless man hopelessly says, that he has no email and he does not even have a computer.

The hiring manager then informs him, that because he has no email address, he is a virtually non-existent person, and so he can not be hired.

Syndicate content